By Tim Stannard

1) Wenger lifts spirits with greatest hits as Klopp craves immortality

Welcome back EPL and welcome back Arsene Wenger!

In these troubled times of doom and gloom, the Arsenal manager has lifted a veil of darkness and given everyone a chuckle by claiming that dollars ain’t nothing but a number and that the Gunners can do battle with the two Manchester teams at the top of the table, despite every single piece of evidence to the contrary since 2004.

“Money does not always the make difference. We can compete on the pitch,” claimed the French coach ahead of a fourth-place finish in the Premier League and a three-week period in November when Arsenal fans may get excited for a while before falling into a familiar sense of gloom and helplessness.

Arsenal’s defense of another underwhelming season kicks off on Sunday against Liverpool, whose coach, Jurgen Klopp hopes to have a campaign that will be remembered for the next 3 million years. Oh yes he does.

2) Track and Field gets underway in Rio as Phelps seeks more golden glory

 It’s Friday and soon the Olympics will really start to its mojo on with the early stages of the track and field activities. But today, there are 24 gold medals up for grabs in other proper sports such as cycling and rowing. And not so proper sports like the 20km walk, which somehow still exists in the athletics roster.

In the pool both Michael Phelps and Katie Ledecky will be looking to add yet more gold medals to their already impressive hauls whilst the men’s basketball team takes on Serbia. The USA women’s soccer team are also in action and face Sweden in the Rio quarterfinals.

3) Challengers look to close PSG lead to 30 points as Ligue Un kicks off

The meat pie and pigeon racing of the English Championship returned last weekend. This Friday, it's the turn of the elan, elegance and more than wiffy cheese of Ligue Un, where 19 teams will battle to stay within 30 points of eventual winners but Zlatan-less PSG.

The race begins live on beIN SPORTS at 1.55PM ET / 10.55AM PT with Bastia taking on PSG and over on Connect from 2.15PM ET / 11.15AM PT it's Monaco without the injured Falcao hosting Guingamp. Catch all the highlights on the XTRA at 7.00PM ET. 

4) Hakan Sukur hunted by Turkish authorities as Arda Turan claims Twitter hack

According to state-media reports out of Turkey, an arrest warrant has been issued for former international striker, Hakan Sukur. Officials said Sukur is being sought on charges of 'membership of an armed terror group'.

Sticking with Turkey-related news and Arda Turan is using the old “hack” excuse to explain why the midfielder ‘liked’ a Real Madrid photo on Twitter.  The image in question was a photo of the badge worn on the sleeves of the players in Tuesday’s UEFA Super Cup clash against Sevilla. Perhaps the Russians have been busy again.

MAYBE DONE DEAL! The transfer of the over-vowled Sporting and Portugal midfielder, Joao Mario, looks back on. Inter have plonked $50m on the table and that appears to have done the trick.

DONE DEAL! Lazio have signed James Bond ally and CIA agent Felix Leiter from Borussia Dortmund. Correction. Apparently it’s midfielder, Moritz Leitner, who is heading to Serie A.

5) Moto GP heads to Austria after summer vacations  

If there is a need for speed this weekend, then the Moto GP might fit the bill. The racing returns after a summer sojourn with Marc Marquez holding quite the lead at the top of the standings.

However, the Red Bull Ring in Austria is quite the speedy circuit and unfamiliar to most riders. Friday's practice is underway with Maverick Vinales very much the Iceman in the first session and fastest. Remember to catch Sunday's Round-10 race live at 6.00AM ET / 3.00AM PT

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The life philosophy of Sports Burst is that if you are not upsetting someone, then you are not trying hard enough. SB is a daily trawl and troll through the morning's sports news to bring you fact-nuggets to make you both smile and swear. Hopefully at the same time.