Miserable Messi Votes To Leave Argentina

Sports Burst

By Tim Stannard

1) Messi calls time on delight of failing miserably for Argentina every summer

So that’s what Leo Messi was plotting whilst forlornly sitting on the bench after Argentina’s third final failure in three consecutive summers. It could have been contemplating putting syrup in Gonzalo Higuain’s shoes or attempting a Vulcan death grip on the amusing but clownish referee for the night. But instead Messi was finalizing his decision to say ‘adios’ to playing football for Argentina at the tender age of 29, with the footballer turning his back on five or six years of more potential angst and misery.

No more psychological torture for Leo aside from the regular round of nonsense when on duty for Barcelona and his club gets knocked out of something or other. "I've tried a lot to be a champion with Argentina. It didn't happen, I couldn't do it," announced Messi after the final which saw Chile lifting the Copa America Centenario trophy.

Some teammates have already asked Messi to take a moment to rethink his future of potential misery with Argentina. Even the victorious Chilean goalkeeper, Claudio Bravo, and not simply because Argentina are easy pickings in finals, especially when Messi is taking penalties. "I hope he continues playing for Argentina many years," admitted Messi’s Barcelona teammate.

At least there may be some good news for Argentinean fans who will be in a state or mourning. Higuain might be one of those to hang up his international boots as well. "There are various players who are evaluating not to continue with the national team,” warned Kun Aguero. Hear the thoughts of our panelists on the LOCKER ROOM at 7.30PM ET.

Oh…one more thing. Told you so! Sports Burst knows all

2) Spain and Italy in massive Euro final repeat as England face centuries of shame against Iceland

Monday could be another day of swift exits in the final two last 16 matches in Euro 2016. Italy are taking on Spain in a repeat of the final four years ago. A repeat of the result and an Italy knock-out will see the last match in charge for manager, Antonio Conte, with the former Juventus man taking over at Chelsea. A loss for Spain to add to a forgettable World Cup in Brazil will almost certainly see the departure of Vicente Del Bosque.

There is an awful lot to lose for England in the day’s second and final clash. A defeat would almost certainly see the end of days of manager, Roy Hodgson and Wayne Rooney doing a Messi and giving up as well as decades of ridicule for losing to a country with a population of 330,000 in the form of Iceland.

3) PSG officially fire Blanc and Nottingham Forest balance French coach equilibrium

After a week of labor limbo, Laurent Blanc has officially left his position as manager of Ligue Un side PSG, after three seasons in charge. The Frenchman was given a contract extension up to June 2018 back in February but despite winning the domestic treble in France, a knock-out in the Champions League quarterfinals spelled the Blanc’s goose being plonked into the oven of fate, setting – FIRED!

Former Sevilla boss and pitch-croucher extraordinaire, Unai Emery, is expected to take up the reigns in the French capital now that there is a Blanc slate at the club.

But as one French manager losing his job, another finds one in a moment of beautiful universal balance. Championship side, Nottingham Forest, have thought better of hiring Ryan Giggs, and instead plumped for former Real Sociedad and Rennes manager, Philippe Montanier.

4) Liverpool set to sign Mane as Zlatan edges towards Mourinho

Liverpool are about to splash some cash. Southampton’s Sadio Mane is on Merseyside on Monday for a medical to seal a deal for the Senegal forward worth a reported $40 million, depending on how much the British pound tanks over the next few hours.

ZLATAN NEWS! A news daily feature even if there isn’t any ZLATAN NEWS! Today’s is the story that the super Swede is set to meet Jose Mourinho this week to discuss His move to Manchester United.

5) Australia unites between new MotoGP star as Wimbledon restores order to UK

To make up for the crushing disappointment of the nation’s rugby team being whitewashed 3-0 by England in a series Down Under, the nation’s celeb’s and sports stars have gathered around the Moto GP BBQ to congratulate the surprise winner of Sunday’s Assen GP, full-blooded Aussie Jack Miller.

The UK might be somewhat chaotic at the moment, but at least the strawberries and cream of Wimbledon has returned to add some stability to Her Majesty’s homeland. At time of writing, Novak Djokovic is kicking off his defense of the Wimbledon title with Roger Federer up later on. Venus Williams leads the way in the women’s bracket. Catch a full round-up in tonight’s new look extra at 7PM.

 

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The life philosophy of Sports Burst is that if you are not upsetting someone, then you are not trying hard enough. SB is a daily trawl and troll through the morning's sports news to bring you fact-nuggets to make you both smile and swear. Hopefully at the same time.