by tim stannard

1) real madrid break with traditional tradition with kante link

it is either a sign that zinedine zidane really has taken the power-pants off florentino perez at real madrid, or a simple story to flog some papers on a quiet day with no football.

but let’s run with the first narrative. sports burst has mouths to feed. mainly its own. spanish sports daily ‘marca’ – and rumor mongers extraordinaire - are plonking leicester city and france midfielder, n’golo kante, on wednesday’s front cover claiming that real madrid are targeting the midfielder as the “new claude makelele” – a footballer sold by the club 13-years ago and never really replaced.  

should the signing come to fruition, the deal will break with the fine real madrid tradition of signing very expensive footballers that they don’t really need – hello, james rodriguez and danilo – and flogging those they do – goodbye, angel di maria and mesut ozil. and that would be a shame.

2) calls continue for messi to rethink argentina retirement rage

with leo messi now in hiding and untraceable – england’s midfield could have been a good spot to go under cover – those close to the footballer are still urging the quick-feet quitter to rethink his decision to go into international retirement after argentina’s copa america final defeat to chile. luis suarez, for one, has said that he hopes that his barcelona colleague will rethink his decision to say adios to the albiceleste.

meanwhile, argentina’s president took time off from staving off financial meltdown to urge messi to return to the football fold. mauricio macri revealed that he spoke to messi on monday. "i told him not to pay attention to all the comments being made because, in truth, we are very happy."

another argentinean is making news on wednesday with barcelona slamming the door on any such notions of javier mascherano joining juventus, a story that has been pleasing clickbait over the past month. the club’s international sporting director, ariedo braida, told italian media that masche is going nowhere.

3) hulk set to small chinese super league transfer record in shanghai slammer

in one of the most insanely overpriced deals in football history – since the last one, anyway – hulk has arrived in china where the brazilian striker is set to sign for shanghai sipg for a reported league record of $55 million. $55 million! $300 million has already been spent by chinese super league clubs on the likes of ramires and jackson martinez.

beep! beep! belgium and marseille striker, michy batshuayi, has thought better of a move to epl side crystal palace and is set to sign for chelsea instead. the 22-year-old will reportedly have his medical once his duties with belgium at euro 2016 are over. the deal could be worth up to $44 million. incidentally, beIN SPORTS is the home to ligue un, so tune in when the season comes back and you catch the likes of martial, payet and batshuayi before they get famous so you can be super smug about it.

a sideways move in france. midfielder, jeremy toulalan, moves from monaco to bordeaux on a two-year deal with the former french international claiming to want a move nearer his hometown of nantes.

4) zlatan non-news and championship becoming new champions league with another high profile appointment

zlatan news! well. not really. however, the bbc are writing that his move to manchester united could be sealed by the end of the week. then again, it might not. or he might move somewhere else in the end. king zlatan did promise to surprise everyone, after all.

the championship is the new champions league. adding to the star quality of rafa benitez at newcastle united and aston villa coach, roberto di matteo, wolves are set to recruit former porto and spain u-21 boss, julen lopetegui. the former spain u-21 boss was expected to take over vicente del bosque as the full time spain manager. oh, guess what? the championship is on beIN SPORTS as well.

perhaps due to a history of setting low expectations and achieving them with aplomb, england are reportedly sounding out arsene wenger as their next coach. while that process takes place, the current u-21 manager and former centerback, gareth southgate, is set to have the interim job of coaxing players back to the england fold, in the manner of forcing a cat to take a bath.

5) spieth undecided on olympics trip as nov and rog take the stage at wimbledon

jordan spieth has revealed that he has not yet made a decision on whether to go to rio 2016. the golfer’s comments followed after rory mcilroy and world number one, jason day, pulled out of the olympics over fears of the zika virus.

novak djokovic and roger federer are the main attractions in the men’s draw on day 3 of wimbledon. in the women’s bracket, number three seed, agnieszka radwanska, has just moved through to round three having just beaten kateryna kozlova.

what is sports burst?

the life philosophy of sports burst is that if you are not upsetting someone, then you are not trying hard enough. sb is a daily trawl and troll through the morning's sports news to bring you fact-nuggets to make you both smile and swear. hopefully at the same time.